the doctor is in.

[charmful]

Need advice? Want to get something off your chest? Feel like asking me something? Or just in the mood to randomly spam? Leave it here!

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[charmful]

I think it’s really easy to get hung up on the promise of what the future holds if the change that you’re asking of this person happens— but at the same time, I think the disappointment of that change not yet happening in the present can be emotionally draining. Are they showing any signs that they’re making an effort to change? Because if they care about you in any way, they should be showing you that they’re making an effort. Depending on what’s being asked of them through this second chance, it might take them more time than what you would have hoped for. And I think it’s also how you position it— did you tell them clearly that this was a second chance that you’re giving them, and they had only this one opportunity to make things right? The clarify and definitiveness of a statement like that can change how they respond. I would say if there’s some sort of progress, then a couple of months seems reasonable? But if they’re not showing any sort of attempt, then a month seems fair. But I'm also the kind of person who wants to believe in the best of people, so maybe I'm being too generous in the amount of time that I'm suggesting. Ah, I hope this all made sense, it ended up being a longer response than I anticipated. I hope it was helpful!

I also don’t really know how screening and things work for anonymous comments… so I’m going to leave my response unscreened for now. If you would like me to screen it, just comment letting me know!